Talk:Femaa (otherwords the second heart of Jamaa)/@comment-26348716-20151014055418

Great story, but it could use some work. Has many errors, spelling errors, and grammatical errors. I hate to point out negative things on anything, but here are a few things. When speaking, it should be like this: "Hi, Mary!" not -Hi, Mary"-.

The wrong which is used. (which witch is which xD) Which means which way, witch is an evil person.

Some of these have obvious errors, like "bunnt". Remember to re-read! Isn't spell-check enabled? Oh well. I am SO SO sorry to have to point out these in this amazing story, but I am honestly trying to help. I'm not trying to be mean!