Resident Enis ~Song Story~

I've been watching too much Markiplier lately ._.

So yeah

This is a thing.

~Shy~

Bold: *opens door and drags an injured Christian inside Italic's lab*

Shy: *follows him and closes door*

Bold: Gonna need a bandage for that..

Shy: Or a buttload of idodide, heh.

Bold: We need a Hellhound antidote.

Italic: *jumps out*

Bold: Vampire!

Italic: Where?

Shy: Bold, you got to kill the last one!

Bold: No, that was a warlock, this is-

Italic: Devishly handsome sparkly vampire named Enis?

Bold: Shut up.

Italic: *watches as Christian groans* Is he gonna be okay?

Bold: I dunno, you tell me.

Italic: Well, he looks like he's been bit by a Hellhound, so, probably not!

Shy: Cool, I'm just gonna kill this guy! *holds a dagger to Italic's neck*

Italic: Wait wait wait! I can SAVE your friend's life!

Shy: How can we trust a blood sucking vampire?

Italic: Simple! I'm a vegan! I don't eat anything with a face! I generally tear the face off first.

Bold: I feel safer already..

Italic: I can fix your friend up lickety-split! Let me grab my magical spellbook! *grabs a leather book and flips through a few pages* Chapter 54, page 105: "Create a Hellhound Antidote and keep your victim alive!" It says to cover one eyeball, and the other one too.

Shy: What for?

Italic: That's what the book says to do! We'll need a pile of raisins and a magical word,

I like to use the term "Linguine" 'cause it's pretty absurd!

And once we've found ourselves some rasins, pour them into a shoe;

Then flick your ear- *flicks Bold's ear*

Bold: *growls and glares at him*

Italic: That's what the book says to do!

Italic: We have to iron a cactus, stick a bee up your nose!

And then we'll eat a plate of flapjacks, draw some faces on toes!

We'll all hold hands until they're sweaty, we'll pretend we can fly!

And if we don't - we'll die! *falls off balcony*

Bold & Shy: *looks off balcony, confused*

Italic: *comes out of door, smiling* (I made that part up.)

Italic: Here, hold this! *hands Bold a baby doll*

Bold: It looks diseased..

Italic: Now you take a creepy baby doll and shake it all around!

Then you shriek like a weasel while you flail on the ground! *weasel noises o.o*

And once we've done that for two hours, throw that baby down the stairs,

Then we'll hit each other with metal chairs! *hits Bold*

Bold: Wait wha- *falls over*

Shy: I'm having second guesses about this spell-casting stuff..

Bold: *holds up tutus* Okay, I found a couple tutus-

Italic: That's not nearly enough!

Italic: Next we'll scatter someone's ashes as we throw a parade!

And then we'll sit and have a séance while we're playing Old Maid!

Italic: *puts a hat on Bold and hats a jar to Shy*

Wear a big hat! Drink from this jar!

Shy & Bold: None of this song makes sense so far..

Italic: I hope I have some chickens left! *races off*

Bold: I don't know what he's up to, but it's certainly weird..

Shy: He keeps asking for toenails..

Bold: and a Leperchaun beard!

Shy: I don't think we should trust him, he's completely insane!

Bold: And all the nonsense we're doing seems expressly inane!

Shy: We should totally kill him!

Bold: Yeah, seems like you're right.

Shy: I mean, he looks pretty puny,

Bold: won't be much of a fight.

Shy: Sneak up behind him

Bold: Dive a stake through his heart!

Shy: Do your worst! *pushes it towards him*

Bold: Ladies first!

Bold & Shy: If you won't impale him Italic will start a new verse!

Italic: *runs in playing a kazoo*

Shy: I might cut his head off.

Bold: He's a vampire, that won't technically kill him..

Shy: It'll definetly make playing the kazoo a lot harder!

Italic: We've gotta whittle a pickle, eat some parmesan cheese,

and then we'll all watch a movie!

"OH NO NOT THE BEES"

And next we take out the garbage, Summon hellbeasts from space

And then, when the portal closes

pull his sleeve up to expose his

wounded arm and kiss your friend's dead face!

Bold: What..?!

Italic: Kiss his face..?

Bold: No, that's disgusting!

Italic: It's what the book says to do!

Bold: We've done 5,000 things from the book!

Shy: Could we eat part of him?

Bold: No!

Shy: Just tryin' to help...

Bold: Ugh, fine.. *leans down and kisses Christian's cheek*

Shy: I ship it.

Bold: He's still dead!

Italic: A-Are you sure he's not just sleeping!?

Bold: You have five seconds.

Italic: *blinks* O-Oh, I was reading the spell, uh, backwards! Okay everyone, one more time, in reverse!

Shy: *groans*

TBC